Matt: Hello! And welcome to the Shut Up and Sit Down 2024 gift guide video. If you’re looking for something delightful to get for someone that you deeply love.
Tom: Or maybe you’re in trouble with the law and need to appeal to the specialist interests of the judge to get yourself out of hot legal water.
Matt: Or maybe you have a co-worker who’s a huge nerd. And if you get her just the right gift, maybe she’ll stop photoshopping you into all of those pictures. Because I know it’s you, Sandra. I can’t prove it, but I do know. Please, Sandra, I used to have a family.
Tom: Or maybe it’s just that time of year where you like to pretend that you’re buying gifts for someone else. But really, you’re just clicking on this video to find something that actually you might quite want.
Matt: And that’s fine!
Tom: We realise that it’s really annoying when we recommend things that people can’t actually buy. So if you want some evergreen recommendations, then you can check out a previous gift guide video. We’ve got a whole bunch of them.
Matt: So, sorry, it is very possible that the recommendations we make in this video may be unavailable quite quickly or unavailable in your region. And there’s nothing we can really do about that.
In fact, it’s your fault. It’s your fault. If you stopped buying all the games that we recommended so quickly, then there wouldn’t be a problem.
Tom: Yeah, why are you doing that?
Matt: Stop it. But we do have your back this year.
And what we’re going to try and do is, in the link in the description, you will find a link to our webpage where we will try and put together a really simple, tight list of games that we’ve recommended as gifts in the past. And that are available mostly as far as we can tell.
Both: We’re trying.
Tom: And with all of that out of the way, let’s talk about those games.
Air, Land & Sea
2 Players
SU&SD Affiliates: USA: Canada: UK:
Matt: First up, we’ve got Air, Land, and Sea. Simply put, this is one of the best head-to-head games that money can buy.
Simple enough to teach to most people, but clever enough still to have them all going, OOOhhh! This small box contains just 18 cards to create something much wider and juicier than anyone could expect. A lot of the game revolves around being able to flip and move around both your cards and your opponents.
Creating a game of canny tactics and a little pinch of bluffing. And it’s available in traditional Axis and Allies flavour and cute, murderous, militarised animals. So there’s something for everyone.
Compile
2 Players
Matt: But let’s say you want a game that’s just like that, but so much spicier that it frankly might need a warning. This is Compile. And honestly, it’s one of the coolest things I have seen in years.
And yes, I am using cool from the perspective of a 17-year-old boy. But I professionally review board games, so let’s set some reasonable expectations. This is a two-player card game that has the same core of flipping cards over and moving them around, but expands on those ideas into exciting new dimensions.
This tiny box of cyberpunk delights is both too demanding and overwhelming for less experienced players. But it’s perfect for anyone like me who loves the idea of playing Netrunner, but can’t reasonably find a way to fit it into their life.
Courtisans
2-5 Players
Tom: We’ve covered Courtisans in a full video review, but I thought I’d mention it here just because it’s a lovely little treatlet. You’re sort of betting on different suits of cards based on what you think other people think that they’re worth, but with a loose and rocky grip on what cards you might even have access to at any given time. It’s full of mind games, bubbly table talk, and little spicy realisations.
Ooh, I can use that to do that? Hohohohohooo!
Paper App Dungeon
1 Player
SU&SD Affiliates: Canada: UK:
Matt: Possibly the tiniest gift in this guide, the ingenious invention that are the Paper App Games are designed to fill the gaps in our lives that would usually just be plugged in with more mobile phone. These games are effectively just a pencil and a notepad that let you play a mobile phone game, but on paper, like you’re some sort of medieval match-three monk trying to crush that candy. Obviously the size of this makes it perfect as a gift, but the main thing we love here is this dice roll pencil.
Such a clever and simple idea, and the great thing is, if you’re on a plane and you drop a pencil, you just pick up the pencil. But if you’re on a plane and you drop one of your dice, you don’t have that anymore. It’s gone. It’s not yours.
And it’s such a perfect thing to offer up to an angry judge. Look, it’s got a pencil in it, so if you write something you want to change later, like guilty, you could cross that out and write, I don’t know, lovely.
Cockroach Soup/Kakerlakensuppe
2-6 Players
Tom: We frequently recommend Cockroach Poker, the horrible little box of lies and deceit that can be enjoyed by the whole family. But the folks who make this game have other horrible offerings. A fast-paced game of naming vegetables incorrectly on purpose.
Do you think this is a carrot? Wrong. It’s obviously a mushroom. Have a billion cards, you’re now losing.
Oh, this little guy? A mushroom? Nuh-uh. Oh, a carrot? No, you’re even more wrong. The answer is obviously… MMmmMMmmmm.
Cheating Bumblebee/Moth
3-5 Players
Tom: And perhaps the only way to solve your family’s rampant inclination to unabashedly cheat is just to make it an intended part of the game. Cheating Bee, or Schummel Hummel, is a game where everyone is kind of allowed to cheat as outlandishly as they wish, throwing, hiding, dropping, lying. It’s all allowed, as long as one player, the Watchful Worm, doesn’t spot you.
For if the Watchful Worm watches you, the Watchful Worm becometh… you.
The Gang
3-6 Players
SU&SD Affiliates: USA: Canada: UK:
Matt: The gang is just cooperative Texas Hold’em Poker. And that might not sound like the most appealing idea in the world, but trust me when I say, it is. Framed as being some kind of Ocean’s Eleven heist scenario, you all use poker chips to signal to one another how good you think your hand of cards is.
And rather than the best hand of cards winning, as a team you have to work out who has the best hand down to who has the worst hand in the right order. This sounds impossible, but it’s honestly actually quite easy. The game does scale up with other ways to make it harder, in ways that are interesting, but basically it’s just a lovely shiny box that’s really easy to teach to people, because it’s mostly a game they already know, poker.
It doesn’t get much easier than that.
Tichu
4 Players
SU&SD Affiliates: UK:
Tom: Okay, listen. We’re taking a day trip to… yeesh…city, with a stop at… oh, are you sure? Boulevard.
Tichu might be my favourite card game, but the production here is flimsy, naff, and riddled with uncomfortable Orientalism. But it is something that you can just play with a couple decks of cards, and so, until Rio Grande sort their act out, you should just do that. Played in two teams across the table, Tichu is nuanced and elegant and thoughtful, both teams trying to win hands and get rid of all of their cards quickly.
But this is a riotous, silly game of gigantic gambles, because before a player has played any cards from their hand, they can declare a Tichu, meaning that if they go out first, they’ll win a huge bounty of points. But if they don’t, they’ll lose that many points. Someone calling a Tichu puts everyone on edge simultaneously.
It’s tremendously exciting, and also just has real competitive legs. What a great game!
Matt: And I’m terrible at it.
Tom: He’s really bad at it.
Matt: I’ve played on the same team as Tom, and you should have seen his face drop when I really…I crapped the bed.
Tom: He s*** the bed.
Just A Fancy Deck of Cards
SU&SD Affiliates: USA: Some Nice Decks:
Deck Featured:
Matt: If we’re talking now about card games, and people who just like cards, and I think we are, then why not just get someone a deck of cards?
A simple gift idea suggested to us by friend of the show and excellent human Philippa Warr, why not go onto Etsy and get a personalised deck of cards? There are services out there that mean you can get whatever pictures you want printed on them. Maybe your favourite parking infringements, photos of loved ones, images that you hope a judge might find sexy.
Also in the same vein, maybe just get someone a really luxurious-looking deck of cards. Honestly, I find sometimes those beautiful shiny boxes, you might not open them for years waiting for the right moment. And in that way, they’re kind of like a modern, less bad version of a box of cigars.
Ohhh Ambassador.
Regicide
1-4 Players
SU&SD Affiliates: USA:
Matt: And while we’re on the topic of cards, just cards, nothing else, just cards. Cards.
Regicide. You ever heard about that game? It’s really good.
Now this is a game you can absolutely play with any deck of cards. But the deck of cards they’ve made specifically for it is lovely. And the more recent addition comes in a sturdy plastic case that makes it great for taking anywhere.
And that’s great because it’s a game you’re going to want to take everywhere. It’s a cooperative game in which you all work together to murder the monarchy. And it’s really hard, but also hugely satisfying.
Just one more go while we wait for our coffees? I think we might crack it this time. Come on! Let’s get that queen!
Misfits
2-4 Players
Tom: The best way to convince someone that modern board games are worth taking a look at is often through the subversion of something familiar. Misfits physical texture and presence is so deeply Jenga, but it’s much more rewarding and way funnier.
Players take turns adding these oddly shaped blocks into a growing tower of junk in front of them. And if you cause the tower to topple, you’re adding everything that fell into your mitts, which is annoying when the goal of a game is just to get rid. But these odd blocks make for such interesting and satisfying stacking puzzles.
Matt: WoOooOo!
Tom: Wooo! Sneak a little cube onto an overlooked nook or create a hellishly curved surface for the next player to helplessly slide off of. One group might play a vicious and nasty game of making angular and obtuse stacks, whereas another might build a beautifully cooperative and artistic centrepiece on the table. Delightful!
Seaside
1-5 Players
SU&SD Affiliates: USA: Canada: UK:
Matt: Seaside is a bag that contains all of the mystery and majesty of the sea. What more do you want? It’s the sea in a bag.
I could tell you how it works and that you take it in turns to pull discs from a bag that do different things based on which side you choose. I could tell you about the way that you’ll choose to keep pulling out tiles and your hungry quest for all of the crabs. I could tell you about the horror you’ll feel about having to throw away your biggest stack of seagulls.
But you don’t need to know any of that. It’s just the sea in a bag, so that’s Christmas sorted.
Dro Polter
2-5 Players
SU&SD Affiliates: USA: Canada: UK:
Tom: A beautifully rare game in which it feels great to be an absolute loser, Dro Polter is a strange little creature. This is a dexterity game in which you all hold the same set of tiny objects in your hand. You’ll then flip a card and then quickly race to be the first person to drop exactly those depicted objects just using that one hand.
Wriggling it around like the irritating meat puppet that it is. It’s basically impossible, and I’m really bad at it. But that’s great, because the prize for winning is a tiny golden bell, a nice shiny point that then has to stay in your hand, because if you drop it at any point during your wrangling, ohhh, then you lose it for good.
I can’t drop the bells because I never get them, but watching everyone else do that brings me tremendous joy. It’s perfect for Christmas, because this game has the essence of a cruel, practical joke.
Wilmot’s Warehouse
2-6 Players
SU&SD Affiliates: USA: Canada: UK:
Matt: Big disclaimer, this is a game that we actually worked on. Now, if you read one of the newsletters we did a little while ago, I talked about that process quite a lot. But that does mean that there’s an obvious and important caveat we need to make here.
If you buy this game, we will directly benefit from that. Only a little bit, but a bit.
And so you would be sensible, and I’d actually encourage you to ignore any opinions we have about this game, even though we both really like it.
Tom: I really like it.
Matt: Stop it, Tom. Stop influencing people.
Tom: I’m sorry, I’m sorry.
Matt: Seriously, though, we couldn’t not mention this game, because anyone will probably enjoy it, and it comes in a really lovely box. And that’s, like, the dictionary definition of a gift. So I… I don’t know.
And I’m not going to tell you any more than that, but I would just ask that you go and have a look at what other reviewers and critics have said about this game, and I’d ask that you trust me when I tell you that doing that will not be a waste of your time.
And that’s it.
Lacuna
2 Players
SU&SD Affiliates: USA: Canada: UK:
Matt: Ah, but that’s not it. I know what you’re thinking.
On that table, the whole video, we’ve had Lacuna, and we haven’t mentioned Lacuna, and it’s because we forgot to film the bit for Lacuna. So I’m doing that here now. And it’s a similar caveat here.
This game is also made by CMYK, a company that, as we’ve said, we do work with sometimes, but the reason we work with them is because literally no one out there in the space makes better board game products than CMYK do. And so we keep having to recommend them and tell you about them, which means we also keep having to do these caveats. And it’s frankly slightly frustrating, but, hey, what are you going to do?
But gosh, if this game isn’t speaking to you solely on an aesthetic level, then you might need an oil change on your soul. This two-player game is a tactile delight that’s just a beautiful thing to noodle around with. Finding lines between matching shapes and blocking each other in a head-to-head battle is just unbelievably chill.
It’s the best thing to happen to the tube since Pringles, and that mustachioed little freak is absolutely livid.
Tim Clare’s ‘The Game Changers’
SU&SD Affiliates: USA:
Tom: Warning. This is not a board game or a card game. Trying to approach it as such will lead to injury, death, or a secret sexy third thing.
If you know someone who is really into board games, but you don’t want to risk getting them an actual game, imagine! Then maybe get them one of the best books about games that I’ve read. The Game Changers is a joyous little jaunt through the history of table games, a fabulous grab bag of stories about how we might think about cardboard and dice. But it’s not just a history lesson.
It’s a really witty and accessible text that still manages to get into the weeds of why games are so important, so exciting, and so deeply human.
Matt: And you know what else is human and occasionally a joy? It’s us.
Tom: Wow.
Matt: Wow, what a seg. If you’ve enjoyed this video, hopefully you’re going to go away and get one of these games, either for yourself or for someone else, and have a wonderful time.
Tom: Mhm!
Matt: If we’ve done that for you in the past already, and you’ve had a wonderful time, maybe go to Shut Up & Sit Down and chuck us a few pounds, dollars, whatever you’ve got.
Tom: Four?
Matt: Yeah, four of them, please.
Tom: Five?
Matt: Four or five. One of those numbers.
Tom: 900.
Matt: No, don’t do that.
Tom: Please.
Matt: You’re going to have a problem at home.
We really appreciate it. We’re very heavily funded by people who just love what we do and enjoy what we do. That’s it.
Tom: That’s it.
Matt: Thank you very much.
Tom: Simple as that.
Matt: So thank you for giving us the biggest gift of all this Christmas.
Matt: Happiness
Tom: Money.
Matt: Happ…Oh Tom!
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That’s our shamelessness gone. For now. Goodbye!
