News 31 - Shut Up & Sit Down

Games News! 19/10/15

Quinns: We proceed directly to the big news of the week, do not pass “Go”, definitely do not collect £200. Put it back!

Stonemaier Games has launched their Scythe Kickstarter upon the waiting world. At the time of writing it’s received a million dollars in just six days, and I’ve never found it so easy to see why.

You have Jakub Rozalski’s art and worldbuilding, pairing mechs with a rich tapestry of 19th century Eastern Europe. You have a timely design, offering the economic engine-building of Eurogames with the conflict and theme and tiny mechs that are going to get players excited. You’ve got a selection of editions to choose from, each of them generous, there’s friendly shipping to Europe, Canada and Australia, and you have Stonemaier Games’ money back guarantee. Don’t like the game after you’ve played it once? They’ll pay for return shipping and refund you completely.

Quinns: Good morning everybody! News: I’ve got it, you want it. Let’s conduct this transaction like a couple of consenting adults. Stop looking at the door! News is entirely legal in the UK.

Board Game Geek News has a Big Book of Madness designer diary up, and goodness me this game looks like a treat. It’s a deeply co-operative, Harry Potter-style deckbuilder, but with a more flexible interpretation of deckbuilding that I find very welcome.

Players are attempting to close an evil book and defeat all the monsters spilling out of it, but you’re not simply slowly improving your deck as the game goes on. You can improve your deck, or spend your turn putting good cards in your friend’s deck, or trying to expunge horrible Madness cards that you’ll slowly amass as the game goes on, or actually closing the damn book.

Paul: Quinns hello Quinns good morning Quinns have you seen? There’s a few interesting things that came in the Games News Sack this morning.

Quinns: That’s not the “Games News Sack”, Paul, that’s the postman’s bag.

Paul: Well he won’t be needing it any more. The important thing is that we’ve got the Games News today. As well as everyone else’s mail. And a few spare, loose limbs.

Quinns: Okay then. I guess now is as good a time as any to start telling people about Tail Feathers! A new skirmish game from Plaid Hat arriving in just a few months that combines Mice & Mystics with the X-Wing Miniatures game.

Quinns: Welcome to the NEWS!

Never mind the jokes and reviews. The NEWS is what you come to this site for for, isn’t it? A great sluice-tube of consumer information, poking through your window and filling your life with piping hot knowledge. Praise be to NEWS.

Today’s first NEWS is that the latest map pack for Ticket to Ride is now available for pre-order, and will add new United Kingdom and Pennsylvania boards to the train-placement smash hit. As always with Ticket to Ride map packs, the new boards each boast new rules. The UK will feature technology upgrades, while Pennsylvania gets stocks and shares.

“This is boll****,” UK Prime Minister David Cameron was heard to have said upon hearing the news. “We waited 11 years to be included in Ticket to Ride, and we’re bundled with Pennsylvania? I don’t even know where that is. Nobody does.”

Quinns: Haikus! Like poems that went through a trash compactor. I think they’re awesome, and have decided to write this week’s Games News entirely in haiku form.

If you think you can do better than any of these, pop your entry in the comments! I’ll pick a winner to go beside my own poems and inevitably outshine them.

Stronghold’s back again
A game of deadly sieges
Enduring the years

Paul: Good morning, Quinns!

Quinns: Good morning, Paul!

Paul: You know what, I think it’s going to be an exciting Games News this week! Let’s get right into the Games News Forecast, beginning with a look at the satellite picture that shows a heavy cloud of zombies coming in from the north.

Quinns: That sounds like one of the all-time bad weeks.

Paul: Don’t worry! It’s just the forthcoming single-player campaign for Zombie 15’. If our review of that one slipped you by, you should know that we recorded it in a single 15 minute take.

Quinns: HELLO everybody! No video this week as Paul’s on holiday and I’m working on something that I want to get just right, but we’ve still got something for your weekend.

Cool Ghosts is a new project from Matt Lees and I that’s kind of “Shut Up & Sit Down, for video games”. Don’t worry about either of us taking time away from SU&SD, though! Matt’s working on Cool Ghosts instead of his prior YouTube channel, and I’m just swapping it in for my old video game freelance work.

Good places to jump in would be my roundup of new releases on Steam, Matt revealing the new Hyper Realistic Turbo 3D Edition of The Witcher 3, of both of us bickering like a married couple as we play Lovers in a Dangerous Spacetime.

You’ll find a load of familiar faces from the SU&SD comments making themselves at home, too. Do go check it out! Unless you hate video games, in which case here’s a video of a sleepy ferret.

Quinns: We’ve got a very special Games News for you today. Paul is quite literally in the Yukon, but coming to us live from a satellite phone!

Can you hear us, Paul?

Paul: Quinns? This isn’t a great time. I’m up a tree at 63.9946° N, 135.4902° W. There’s a bear after me, or I THINK it’s a bear–

Quinns: Paul, the first images have come through for Pandemic Legacy!

Paul: Seriously?

Quinns: Yes! There’s a whole video trailer.

Quinns: Morning, Paul! You ready for some Games News?

Paul: …

Quinns: See that image up top? It’s the first photo we have of The Prodigals Club (previously The Castaways Club), Czech Games’ pseudo-sequel to the wonderful Last Will. We now know that The Prodigals Club will once again see players racing to lose their vast Victorian fortunes, but this time simply because they think that poor people have more fun. Presumably they saw Titanic (the film) but are living in the decade before Titanic (the accident).

But here’s the really cool bit- The Prodigals Club will ship with three modules, which are “trying to lose an election”, “trying to get rid of all your possessions”, and “trying to offend the most influential people in high society”. You can play with any two modules or even all three, but the game will also allow you to bolt your copy of Last Will onto Prodigals Club to replace any one of the three modules. Isn’t that crazy?!

Paul: …

Quinns: I KNOW!

Quinns: Have you finished putting on your make up? The Games News is about to start!

Paul: No! You used up all the rouge, you rogue, I don’t know my lines and this leotard doesn’t fit me at all.

Quinns: That’s a bandanna. Listen, you’re gonna do great! You know the words to the first musical number, right? The one about the newly announced M.U.L.E. board game?

“There’s a game / There’s a new game / It’s about a roooobot donkey”

Games News! 19/10/15

Games News! 12/10/15

Games News! 05/10/15

Games News! 28/09/15

Games News! 21/09/15

Games News! 14/09/15

Introducing… Cool Ghosts!

Games News! 07/09/15

Games News! 31/08/15

Games News! 24/08/15

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