Games News! 13/06/16

hey look a dungeons and dragons ride, your pustules, are the army even allowed to do jokes
Orléans

Paul: Hello and welcome to a very fresh and very exciting Games News! Today I shall bungee from the precipice of journalism deep into the chasm of news, bouncing back upward with only the most thrilling of scoops, the choicest tidbits of board game gossip, the tastiest morsels for your so very particular palate. Does latter suggest that I’m actually dropping out of the sky to snatch at food, like a snickering seagull? Well, I suppose that would be the killjoy’s way of putting it.

Anyway! Let’s kick off with some good old-fashioned wooden chunks.

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Review: Mystic Vale & bonus Mystic Crumble

having a bear, druid dealing, whale song, assisted by the gods of the volcano
mystic vale thumbnail

Ahh, is there anything more beautiful than that most classic of English summers? What about the so very gorgeous cards of Mystic Vale, cards you don’t just play, but cards you can build, piece by piece?

Intrigued? You bet you are! We took our two most experienced druids, Quinns and Matt (Paul is a bard), and we put them in a room with cards and crystals and radiant peaks. We asked them not only how it compares with our two very favourite card games, Trains and Arctic Scavengers, but if it’s capable of being as beautifully magical as the luscious Seasons.

Unfortunately, there was too much conjuration energy in that room.

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Review: Conflict of Heroes: Awakening the Bear

a cartoon buzzing, a non-existent bear, a wet firewalker, a nonsense

Thrower: Why don’t you play wargames? Why, after all I’ve forced SU&SD to publish about them at gunpoint, have you not pressed the nuclear button on this this amazing corner of our hobby? There’s lots of reasons I can think of. Possibly it’s their rumoured rules complexity. Maybe the focus on simulating men being sad in some mud. Or perhaps it’s the drab art and thin components?

WELL, I’ve got a game for you with none of that! It’s called Conflict of Heroes: Awakening the Bear (a series you might remember from my primer on wargames or my article on the best introductory wargames) and Academy Games made it just for you. Yes, you. The publisher even said so on its sister game, Storms of Steel. “The historical wargame that Eurogamers love to play,” was the actual marketing copy.

You can smell the difference between CoH and typical wargames the second you open the lid. It’s the faint scent of solvents from the decadent, multi-coloured printing used on the mounted boards and fat counters. Oddly-named German tanks rumble around in the box. You can even see a flamethrower doing what flamethrowers do in slightly more detail than you probably want. Alas, in spite of the name, there are no actual bears.

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Games News! 06/06/16

boatylicious boats, paul's broken jungle, wooden lemons

Quinns: Exhausted from the UK Games Expo, I have slithered up to my desk with a biscuit and a cup of tea to write the news. Huge thanks to everyone who came along to our live shows, played a part in our live review or witnessed our epic game of Question Wood Toy Folds High. If you weren’t there, not to worry! All will be posted on this site in good time.

As for the spicy slivers of news I’ll be dishing up like a powerful dad, we begin with the announcement of 2016’s Spiel des Jahres nominations! A shadowy council of German board gamers has once again met to hand out board gaming’s most prestigious award, and the only one that can multiply a game’s sales 100 times over. But this year we’ve played all the nominees!

I wonder what we shall think…

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Review: Quadropolis

the furtive pigeon, the exciting office, the bechstein's bat, so easily forgotten

June 3, 2016 Reviews Quadropolis, SU&SD Recommends, New to Games?, Conflict-Free Games, Quick Games, Games for Two HOT TAMALE-BEANS! It’s Quinns with a Shut Up & Sit Down review of Quadropolis! Who could have guessed I am writing this from the UK Games Expo we just did a live podcast and I’ve got no energy … Read more

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Podcast #41: Misery, farkles and Soren Johnson

sexy space cops, sexy church games, bad dryads, wizard martinis

Psst! Down here! Climb into this cramped cave of chat with us. There’s room for one more person. In what could well be our most feature-filled podcast ever, Matt, Paul and Quinns discuss Torchbearer, Merchant of Venus, Dragon FarkleThe Red Dragon Inn and the concept of playing board games in virtual reality, before getting down to (yet another) peculiarly erotic folk game. But wait! There’s more! Quinns snagged video game designer Soren Johnson of Offworld Trading Company to discuss civilisation-building and trading board games. Enjoy, everybody.

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RPG Review: Torchbearer

stay hydrated, you'll never be fresh again, serious triumphs

Hilary: Torchbearer is a dungeon-crawling role-playing game.

So what? There are a lot of dungeon exploration games in tabletop roleplaying. It’s the genesis of the genre, and most of the big tabletop RPGs people are familiar with are of this style. One of the things that differentiates Torchbearer is its heavy emphasis on the crawl. While other games are focused on getting loot, fighting monsters, and generally being completely badass adventurers, Torchbearer is about attempting to get loot and deal with monsters, while being completely worn down by the dungeon experience.

It turns out exploring dangerous unknown environments while lugging a bunch of heavy gear and trying to stay hydrated and rested and fed is really, really hard! It turns out there’s only so much space in your backpack and your habit of checking over every room you enter sometimes gets you into trouble and it’s hard to avoid getting cranky as all hell when you’ve been stuck wandering around dank passageways for hours without any snacks.

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How to Play Lords of Vegas!

gramblin' in the casios, throwing up in a hedge, missing your easyjet flight home

Ever since our review, Lords of Vegas is the economic warfare game that we find ourselves recommending the most. Why pay for flights to Las Vegas when this game lets you gamble, drink heavily, invest unwisely and come to loathe your friends, all from the comfort of your own home?

For other entry-level economic slugfests, do check out Chinatown, or dip way back into the SU&SD archives for a peek at our Black Gold review. It’s one of our earliest ever bits of criticism, and a game we still have a soft (and oily) spot for.

(And yes, this IS our first video to use our YouTube channel instead of Vimeo! We’ll slowly be moving the back catalogue over, as well as putting all future videos on YouTube, but it’s still worth popping over now to check out Matt’s completely dope header image.)

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Golden Week, Day 5: The Hot New Newsletter

are you on email, you simply have to be these days

Quinns: Matt, what is that incredible noise? Ooh, I bet you’re hard at work assembling our next video review!

Matt: No I was just banging these two bits of wood together. Hey, on Monday you said that on Friday we’d tell everyone about the cool projects we’re doing in the near future!

Quinns: Ah. Right. The thing is, I’ve realised that we have to put that in volume #1 of our Hot New Newletter!

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Golden Week, Day 4: Why You Guys Donate

oh god I hope none of these letters are from paul's dad

Paul: Alright, where do you want me? Gimme the A-1.

Quinns: What? Put the saxophone away, Paul. For day 4 of Golden Week we’re doing something a little different. Five months ago I asked our SU&SD donors to tell us why they donate. Today, we’re going to let them do the talking.

Paul: Quinns. This is my dad’s saxophone. You can’t tell me to go and get it and then have me put it away without busting loose at least one hot splank. That’s just funk-a-logical.

Quinns: I never told you to go get it

Paul: B♭ E♭ ♫ A♯

Quinns: STOP IT

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