Conflict-Free Games 6 - Shut Up & Sit Down

SU&SD Play… Eldritch Horror!

Inspired by Lovecraft’s impossible dimensions, we’ve attempted to squeeze a game of Eldritch Horror, one of the most epic board games of all time, into a single Let’s Play video! And to make our lives even harder, we squeezed in both the Forsaken Lore and the Under the Pyramids expansions.

Anyone who missed Quinns’ review of this disasterpiece can find it right here. In short, this is an absolutely bizarre game. Alternately epic and personal, scary and silly, too generous or too unfair, it’s a tremendously hard thing to review. But it’s also fascinating to watch. So pull up a pew, get yourself a beverage, and see if this slimy, tentacular box has a place on your shelf.

Paul: True story: I got in trouble for sewing once when I was six years old. I wasn’t supposed to be sewing because, apparently, sewing is not a thing that a man does. That seems a little strange since I have definitely met some tailors who were men and whose helpful craft meant I wasn’t instead stumbling naked through life. Anyway, being thus steered from sewing surely explains why I’m not as good as I should be at Patchwork.

And it’s such a shame because I want to be better at it. I’m sure I could. I’m certain I’m on the verge of some sort of needlework breakthrough, of a real understanding of petite, precise Patchwork. I cannot stop now. I must master this splendid, splendid challenge. This flat, unassuming and apparently drab affair is so much more than it seems. Do not underestimate its prosaic presentation.

What would it be like to live in a world without words? How difficult might it be to communicate the idea of a person, an object or a work of art through nothing but a collection of slightly ambiguous icons? How would that even go?

If you think the answers to those questions, in turn, are “Pretty awkward!” “Very difficult!” and “It would be a disaster!” then you’re already primed for our first playthrough video of 2016. Paul sat down with some of his friends, a copy of Concept and some very simple rules:

Divide into two teams of two.
Play to a two minute turn limit.
Choose the card (though not the exact concept) the other team must play.
Play the game on the middle of its three difficulty levels. That should be fine, right?

This is what happened.

Whether you’d rather someone else teach your friends to play, you want people to know the rules before they come over, or simply want a closer look at this incredible game, our How to Play videos are there for you.

Not heard of Pandemic Legacy, our game of 2015? You should correct that immediately!

Quinns: Leigh! Thank you for joining us for this review of the Thunderbirds board game, although as you’ve never seen an episode of 1960s TV series you won’t be allowed to talk. You can nod along, though, and say things like “Wow!”.

Leigh: What? You told me you wanted me here as a counterpoint, reviewing this game as someone with no interest in the show.

Quinns: Yes, but I’ve changed my mind. Some things in life are sacred. God, for example, and tea, and the exploits of the Tracy brothers and International Rescue.

Leigh: I mean, I actually have learned a lot about Thunderbirds from playing this game. It’s about boys moving boats and planes around the world and swapping a pink woman among the different vehicles. And then one of them is a tragic space exile. It’s really monstrous.

Quinns: There will be time for me to explain the many and varied ways you are wrong. For now, let’s review!

5…

4…

3…

2…

1…

GO!

Paul: I saw a curious mix of games at this year’s BGGCon, from hard euros to simple set collection games to the rising tensions of Win, Lose, Banana Legacy.† Of all the many things I saw while hiding from the baking Texas sun in the cavernous, subterranean depths of Dallas Fort Worth’s Hyatt Regency, Above and Below was my favourite. Appropriately, it was my underground adventure.

Also, it gave me a chance to try out a Pear Strategy. I went Full Pear, All Out Fruit, and didn’t do too badly for it, either. I quested, I recruited, I constructed and then I made all my money from Big Pear. Meanwhile, my friends hired adventurers, fought bandits and found the legendary Moss King. All in a day’s work.

T.I.M.E. Stories is a whole new kind of co-op board game

It’s time for another of 2015’s most breathtaking releases, and that’s not a euphemism for a fart. Rather, T.I.M.E. Stories is a whole new kind of co-op board game. Your team will complete each time travel scenario in a blistering five hours and then it’s time to buy a whole new deck, making this the most expensive game we’ve ever covered. Great Scott!

On the other hand, the only thing Quinns loves more than the movie Primer are board game expansions. What happens when an immovable force meets an unstoppable object? Tune in and find out.

OH MY GOODNESS! Pandemic Legacy is upon us, daring men and women the world over to command the Centre for Disease Control for one grisly year. What components lie in wait in the box’s secret compartments? What will your story be?

Of course we had to provide you with the earliest possible review. You won’t find a more heartfelt, spoiler-free analysis anywhere.

Share this review, buy this game, fall in love, in that order. Board games don’t come much better than this.

[EDIT: Since publishing this article the 2nd edition of Meteor has gone live on Kickstarter! That’s probably a wiser investment than buying the first edition Quinns reviews here.]

Quinns: Imagine you and your friends are protecting the earth from meteors, assembling rockets from the cards in your hand. Sounds fun, right?

Now imagine you don’t have the right cards for a successful launch. And the clock is ticking and you only have five minutes to clear the board. And now imagine you don’t know how big a payload to launch at each meteor, and if you launch one that’s too big the terrific explosion will accelerate all the other meteors.

Oh, yes. Today we’re reviewing Meteor! It’s mean, exhausting and the art design ranges from underwhelming to unclear, but it’s a megaton of fun. For what it’s worth, if you like high-fiving people, this box could be considered a cardboard portal to the high-five dimension.

Good news! Funemployed, a game of applying for jobs with the world’s worst CV, is so good that it’s snatched away Pictomania‘s paper crown to become our favourite lightweight party game.

Better news! Now you can watch Matt play it with the cast of Regular Features, his VERY RUDE comedy podcast (the video’s not rude, though).

Other good news: Funemployed is currently available with several of our partners.

Enjoy your weekend, everybody!

SU&SD Play… Eldritch Horror!

Review: Patchwork

SU&SD Play… Concept

How to Play Pandemic Legacy!

Review: Thunderbirds

Paul’s Best Game of BGGCon2015: Above and Below

Spoiler-Free Review: T.I.M.E Stories

Spoiler-Free Review: Pandemic Legacy

Review: Meteor

SU&SD Play… Funemployed

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