New to Games? 12 - Shut Up & Sit Down

The Opener: Ultimate Werewolf & Chilli Con Carne

With Halloween just around the corner (or, as we call it here in England, “All Hallow’s Ween”), we’re very proud to present part 1 of our spooktacular gaming suggestions! Neatly reviewed in time for you to place and receive your order in time for the sexiest night of the year. Or was that Pancake Tuesday?

Anyway, to begin with, what could be simpler, safer or spookier than an evening of Ultimate Werewolf? Just you, a big pot of chilli, and between 4 and 60 of your closest friends.

Quinns: Have you heard of Munchkin? It might be the most popular standalone card game in our hobby. You all play Dungeons & Dragons-type heroes racing to reach level 10, alternately working together and wrenching one another backwards. It’s a grinning figurehead for table gaming. And I hate it.

I hate that in parodying D&D so focusedly it erects walls around gaming as a whole, its 20 year-old injokes acting like barbed wire. I hate that it goes on for 30 minutes longer than anyone wants. I hate how the game is entirely based around attacking the lead player, rendering the entire first 60 minutes almost pointless. But most of all, I hate how it gets everywhere.

I’ll be at the pub, explaining SU&SD to some friend or stranger or travelling pervert, and they’ll say “Oh! Yeah, I’ve played Munchkin. It was OK!” And with that, all the icecubes will disappear from my drink, a new wrinkle will appear on my body and all the babies within two miles of us will start crying.

So here it is. My counter-offer. If you want a light, mad card game with a Dungeons & Dragons theme, buy Gauntlet of Fools instead, a game from no less than the creator of Dominion. Also, a game of battling trolls with a hangover, and getting skewered by spear traps while hopping on one leg.

Have you heard of Escape: The Curse of the Temple? Rumoured to be greatest family game of all time, they say it can be found in the Temple to the God of Luck, in the world’s most unfun jungle. Wait. No, hang on, that’s wrong. It’s in Quinns’ flat.

In this review, we answer the question of whether you should buy Escape, we take a look at the Illusions expansion, AND we compare the whole thing to Space Alert. Now, only one question remains: How did Quinns get so dirty?

Leigh: Hi, Shut Up & Sit Down-ers (the Silenced & Seated?)! Thank you for having me back again as your ongoing indie RPG correspondent. Quinns, I think something might have gone off in your fridge, though. What is that?

Quinns: My flat has an Abundance of Rare Meats, but a Scarcity of Hygiene.

Leigh: A reference to the game mechanics, how clever!

So, The Quiet Year. I’m accustomed to roleplaying games that give me the chance to tell a story about a character, through interaction with other characters, but this game is different: Two to four players collaborate over a map to tell the story of a place, and the narrative that unspools itself is about the challenges a community faces following a long war, given one year to prepare for the advent of the mysterious Frost Shepherds.

What are the Frost Shepherds? Who knows! What is this place? Well, that’s what you play to discover. The designer, Avery Mcdaldno, calls it the world’s first cartography RPG.

Disclaimer: Since this video was published, SU&SD has been made aware of a striking quantity of homophobic and transphobic content in this board game. The game’s tone was first established by the first edition in 1985, and today, it’s definitely showing its age. More information is available here, courtesy of Meeple Like Us.

When was the last time you had some friends over, one of you got abducted by an elephant, one captained a war fleet and another had eight babies*? It was NEVER, wasn’t it? Admit it!

Tales of the Arabian Nights can fix that. You might not know it, but there’s a gaping hole in your board game collection. A hole that begs to be filled. And you must fill it. You must fill it with this. The finest storytelling board game in existence.

Have a great weekend, everybody! Ideally, make sure it’s great by playing this.

*And was then abducted by an elephant.

Quinns: Also in celebration of our 2nd anniversary, we’ve done something a bit different. And hopefully, a bit useful.

It’s a short video about board gaming that’s not for you, but any friends, family or colleagues who don’t yet know about your hobby. A glimmering, electric antidote, if you will, for anyone who hears “Board games” and thinks “Monopoly”. There aren’t any swears at all, and only a smidge of dressing up, so please:

Share away. Let’s tell the world about this glorious hobby of ours.

Happy anniversary, everybody. We love you.

— Team SU&SD

The Opener: Infinity Dungeon & Awful Jelly

Get ready to GET EXTRAVAGANT! Matt Lees’ The Opener is back with another game to kick off your evening, and a perfect accompanying snack.

This week Matt picks over the crashed zepplin of ideas that is Level 99 Games’ Minigame Library, and finds something interesting but it goes a bit wrong. He also applies his trademark culinary expertise to an English delicacy known as “vodka jelly”, which seems quite interesting but it goes a bit wrong.

We blame the heat. Englishmen react about as well to heat as chocolate does. When will it end? It must be 20°C in here.

The Opener: Ladies & Gentlemen and Homemade Scones

Get ready to GET EXTRAVAGANT! The Opener is a search for the perfect way to start your board game night. Already, in the second ever episode, Matt might have found it.

Ladies & Gentlemen is a team game about Victorian women shopping furiously for a glamorous ball, as well as the husbands they command like so many nervous ponies. How angry could you get about an imaginary dress? You’re wrong. You’re so wrong.

Matt also suggests you make scones, which are apparently the adorable training wheels of the baking world. We wouldn’t know. Our oven’s been broken since Paul baked Talisman that one time.

Introducing the rare SU&SD DOUBLE FEATURE! Commence rejoicing, and insert babies and hats into your triumphant tossing machines.

First up, we’ve got Quinns reviewing Japanese-designed String Railway. Oooh, it’s an irritatingly clever one that we’re big fans of. THEN you’ll all be able to enjoy the inaugral Board Gaming with Brendan. Which is… it… it’s something you can watch.

Enjoy, people!

We can’t get enough of The Resistance. We’d mainline it if we could. It’s a perfect game that cuts a table full of people into ignorant heroes and traitorous spies. All the good guys need to do is send three teams on three succesful missions, which is tricky… because the spies know who one another are.

It’s a game better seen than explained. Only then will you suffocating weight of the lies this game spawns. Here, we’re playing The Resistance: Avalon, a standalone sequel with an Arthurian theme.

The Opener: Ultimate Werewolf & Chilli Con Carne

Review: Gauntlet of Fools

Review: Escape: The Curse of the Temple

RPG Review: The Quiet Year

Review: Tales of the Arabian Nights

An Intro to Board Gaming, For your Friends!

The Opener: Infinity Dungeon & Awful Jelly

The Opener: Ladies & Gentlemen and Homemade Scones

Review: String Railway

SU&SD play… The Resistance: Avalon

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